Far OUT! You have got to be kidding...

I woke up this morning to find my foot is sore again. Not only that, but I also have a sharp pain in the other one, too. Feels like a pinched nerve or something.

All from walking 3km?

Blah!

TT

This morning I went to the 5km time trial at Shorncliffe. It was really good to see everyone, although I felt really self-conscious going back looking and feeling so overweight and unfit. Was great to see Uncle Phil though, who is looking heaps better after his surgery.

So much has happened since I was last there – the problems with my foot and then the other stuff that’s had me in hospital three or four times… all in all, I feel rather changed by the last few months. Hopefully in a good way. Time will tell, I guess!

Anyway, my orthotics are still painful, so I probably walked 3km today. My feet are sore, though not blistered. I did attempt to run a couple of hundred metres, just to see what it feels like with the orthotics and it felt truly bizarre, like I am running with my toes turned in and down. My body weight and stride has shifted so much that I’m paranoid I’m going to twist my ankle or fall over. I’m not quite sure what affect running on the outside of my feet is going to have on the rest of me, either.

Anyway, babysteps.

Only seven months, three weeks to go until I can take them out.

Orthotics...

Orthotics....

Ow.

I feel like I'm walking on potatoes. It feels so unnatural having my weight moved to the outside edge of my feet. Like I'm going to twist my ankles very easily.... I am currently doubting very much that I will ever be able to run on these, let alone get used to it! They're so hard.

Time will tell, I suppose. I go back for a final check in, in a few weeks.

I may attempt to walk the 5km time trial on saturday, depending on blisters.

update

Well, I pick my orthotics up tomorrow. They said I should wear them for a week to get used to them before starting to try to run again. With the rain and cold last night, my foot is still hurting which means I shouldn't really run until it doesn't hurt again anyway.

I also appear to have an ear infection, caused by a sore throat, which was caused by hayfever. Consequently, I constantly feel like I've been swimming and want to jump up and down and shake my head to dislodge the fluid. No gratifying rush of water though. Sooooo frustrating! It also means I'm almost completely deaf in one ear and very dizzy as a result. My lovely running doc, C, is on holidays, but if it's not better in a few days, I'll have to see one of the other doctors for some antibiotics or something.

Had coffee with my lovely now-running friend, E, last night. She has started coming to the run inn and is loving it. I hope I can get back to the point where we would be able to plod together.

Am starting to tackle some of the other health issues I've had recently. It's a slow process and long term treatment, but I'm going to give it a go to see if it works. Better than doing nothing.

Drumroll, please... finally saw the foot doc

Went to see the foot doctor today and ended up spending the entire day at the Brisbane Private Hospital. I am so completely over spending days inside hospitals, but I decided, after waiting for months to get in and see the specialist it would be worth it just to finally, finally get a prognosis.

My initial appointment was at 9.30am. The doc looked at all the x rays, bone scans and then finally, the last MRI that diagnosed the Bursitis. Then he tells me that actually, he doesn't think it is bursitis at all. Instead, he thinks a bit of the bone in my foot has died because it shows up as a horrible grey colour, not white like fluid. This would also explain why nothing showed on the bone scan, since there is no increased blood flow to make it a 'hotspot'.

Cue much panic and him not giving me a straight answer on what would happen if it was dead.
So, I get sent straight off for another $450 MRI scan to confirm it.

With much baited breath and gnashing of teeth (and contemplating a lifetime of pain in my foot or surgery or far worse no more running) I finally get back in to see the specialist at 4pm.

He reviewed the new MRI and turns out it is bursitis after. Phew. Chronic Sesamoiditis, to be precise. To fix it, I've got to get an orthotic made for the foot and wear it for six to eight months. It will probably take that long until the inflammation goes down and the bursa thins out again. I can try running on it when it starts to feel better but I have to stop immediately if it hurts. So this means no long runs for a long time and counting forwards eight months, looks like I might not make it to the GCM next year either. Waa.

Looking at the bigger picture, I know this is actually good news (no surgery or cortisone!) and I'm very happy the bone wasn't dead. I guess part of me had been waiting for this appointment for so long that I had half imagined there'd be some magic bullet cure. Or that it wouldn't take so long to fix. Or that I'd known how to fix it months ago. At the moment I just feel cranky because I walked alot yesterday to stir it up for the specialist and consequently my foot now hurts like hell again and I'm truly, truly sick of it.

But there we are. Thinks could be worse. Once I have a couple of orthotics made, I can start trying to run again. That at least, is something.